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Of all of them still loved him in spite of the fear and the hate and sometimes the volatile mixture of emotions made him want to cry out at the sight of his father coming to simply cry out: "I love you Daddy! Go away! Hug me! I'll kill you! I'm so afraid of you! I need you!" And his father seemed to sense in his stupid way-he was a stupid man and selfish - that all of them had gone beyond him but Jacky the youngest knew that the only way he could touch the others was to bludgeon them to attention. But with Jacky there was still love and there had been times when he had cuffed the boy's mouth into running blood and then hugged him with a frightful force the killing force just barely held back by some other thing and Jackie would let himself be hugged deep into the atmosphere of malt and hops that hung around his old man forever.
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